What if we were all of it, all at once?

If I asked you to jot down your strengths and flaws on a piece of paper, you could probably do it pretty easily, right?

Over time, we get to know ourselves. We know we're more like this than like that.

“I have a short temper.”

“Punctuality and I don’t get along.”

“I’m someone who tells it like it is.”

“I’m resilient.”

Basically, we’ve got our list sorted: strengths on one side, flaws on the other.

And of course, it would never cross our minds to say we have a quality and its opposite.

If I’m impatient, then I’m not patient—

Right?

We can’t be both.

That wouldn’t make any sense…

At least, that’s what I used to believe.

But then, through my journey with Listen to Your Body, I discovered something that turned that belief upside down.

What if our strengths and flaws were inseparable?

We tend to think we’re either strong or fragile.

Either brave or cowardly.

Either generous or stingy.

But the truth is:

We are all of it.

Not necessarily to the same degree. Not all the time.

It depends on the moment. It depends on the context.

But, each personality trait is like a coin.

On one side, there’s the strength.

On the other, the flaw.

And you can’t have a coin with only one side.

If you’ve got one, you’ve automatically got the other.

The fact that we show one side more often than the other doesn’t mean the flip side doesn’t exist.

Becoming aware of this changes everything.

Because this idea that we’re one way or another…

It’s not reality.

It’s a construct of the ego—a convenient little shortcut to put us into neat little boxes and avoid change.

When your ego decides who you are… and stops you from being you

The ego loves labels.

It finds them reassuring. They give it a clear identity.

And more importantly… they help it avoid change.

Let me give you a concrete example.

As far back as I can remember, I’ve always been a hard worker.

Financially independent since I was 18, I worked my way through everything.

Then in my career, I kept up the pace:

leadership roles at a young age, nonstop hustle, full-throttle work mode.

Hardworking, resilient… it became my identity.

And honestly, on paper, it looked like a good thing.

But the problem was, I had become just one side of the coin.

So what happened when I needed to tap into the other side?

When I needed to slow down?

To make time for myself?

To do nothing?

I couldn’t.

If I wanted to spend a weekend wrapped in a blanket,

doing absolutely nothing, binge-watching series instead of being “productive”…

That voice in my head would kick in:

💭 “Come on, lazybones. Get it together!”

💭 “You’re seriously just gonna lie around all day?”

💭 “You’ve got things to do—get moving!”

Because to my ego, I had become Wonder Woman.

And Wonder Woman doesn’t lounge around in fuzzy pajamas watching Netflix.

And the few times I did finally give in and rest, once I’d hit my limit…

I couldn’t even enjoy it.

The guilt would eat me alive.

Because in my mind,

resting was wrong.

The ego blocks us from evolving (in both directions)

And guess what?

This mechanism works the other way too—with the flaws we assign to ourselves.

Let’s take another example.

A few years ago, tired of hating my body,

I decided to start working out.

My ego threw a party. 🎉

💭 “Pff, please. You’re not athletic.”

💭 “How long is this gonna last—one week?”

💭 “You’ve been saying you’ll quit smoking for five years and never did. No willpower. Working out? Yeah, right.”

The ego is a sniper.

It knows exactly where to aim to shut us down.

It’ll do whatever it takes to win—and it knows just how to manipulate us.

Why?

Because it’s stuck in the past.

It doesn’t believe we can change.

It’s terrified we might.

That would disrupt the entire identity it’s built and holds onto so tightly.

So it simply refuses to see us any other way.

• It stops us from accepting parts of ourselves it finds “unacceptable.”

  (If I allow myself to rest 👉 I’m lazy 👉 lazy is bad.)

• It stops us from exploring new parts of who we are.

  (If I’ve never been sporty 👉 I never will be.)

Basically, it locks us in a mental prison.

And the worst part?

We don’t even realize we’re locked in.

What if we let go of that illusion?

We’re human.

We evolve.

We’re paradoxical.

We’re many things at once.

So why not give ourselves permission to be all our parts?

👉 To be a hard worker and a procrastinator.

👉 To be patient and impatient.

👉 To be strong and vulnerable.

At Listen to Your Body, they often say:

“The more you resist, the more it persists.”

And it’s true.

The more I tried to force myself to keep going,

the more I felt the need to slow down.

Because the key is acceptance.

It’s by accepting who we don’t want to be…

that we become free to shift.

Embracing all our sides is how we reclaim the power to choose

These days, I try not to define myself by strengths or weaknesses.

I try to embrace every part of me.

I see my personality traits like clothes in my closet.

In there, I’ve got my Wonder Woman costume,

but I also have my fluffy pajama pants.

I’m learning to wear those pajamas.

More importantly, I’m learning to feel good in them.

Because the more I embrace them,

the easier it is to put the Wonder Woman suit back on—

without turning it into armor.

And you…

what’s in your closet? 😉